I’m not going to make it to 31, y’all. I just don’t have the time I thought I would to watch these movies. Add my new rule that I don’t have to finish a movie if I think it’ll be a 2 or 3, and it’s definitely harder to watch enough movies. But I’m going to see how close I can get, because I really am enjoying it.
Until this month, I would have told you that, zombie movies aside, I’m not a fan of horror movies, but now I know I’m just not a fan of a certain type of horror movie. I don’t like gross out horror, but I do like a good jump scare. Anyway, here’s a list of the 14 I’ve watched at the time of writing this post.
I would just like to warn everyone that there are probably spoilers down below. I won’t go out of my way to spoil anything, but I also won’t be very strict about it either.
- Let Us Prey (Amazon Prime)
- At one point in this movie I said “What the fuck is wrong with this town?” More a thriller than a horror (though I’m assured it’s a horror movie), I really enjoyed it. Also, Liam Cunningham is fantastic.
- Shane’s rating: 7
- My rating: 8
- At one point in this movie I said “What the fuck is wrong with this town?” More a thriller than a horror (though I’m assured it’s a horror movie), I really enjoyed it. Also, Liam Cunningham is fantastic.
- Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum (Amazon Prime)
- I love found footage films, and this one is definitely that. There were some jump scares, and a few scenes that were clearly inspired by Blair Witch, but overall it was more spooky than scary.
- Shane’s rating: 6.5
- My rating: 6
- I love found footage films, and this one is definitely that. There were some jump scares, and a few scenes that were clearly inspired by Blair Witch, but overall it was more spooky than scary.
- Wolf of Snow Hollow (Amazon Prime)
- I loved this movie. No notes. I wouldn’t really call it overly scary, but I did jump a few times. Mostly I enjoyed the acting, story, and the fact that Riki Lindhome was the serious & sensible one. Honestly, if this horror movie project is good for nothing else, I’m glad it brought me to this movie.
- 10 for both of us.
- I loved this movie. No notes. I wouldn’t really call it overly scary, but I did jump a few times. Mostly I enjoyed the acting, story, and the fact that Riki Lindhome was the serious & sensible one. Honestly, if this horror movie project is good for nothing else, I’m glad it brought me to this movie.
- Triangle (Amazon Prime)
- Triangle is super trippy, and it takes a little bit to figure out what is going on. It’s entertaining, but leaves a lot of questions and the ending isn’t my favorite. However, it has a baby faced Liam Hemsworth the year before his Nicholas Sparks movie, and he looks completely different.
- Shane’s rating: 5
- My rating: 4.5
- Triangle is super trippy, and it takes a little bit to figure out what is going on. It’s entertaining, but leaves a lot of questions and the ending isn’t my favorite. However, it has a baby faced Liam Hemsworth the year before his Nicholas Sparks movie, and he looks completely different.
- Incantation (Netflix)
- Another found footage-style horror movie, this Taiwanese supernatural story is really well told, and I was still thinking about it the next morning. The child actor in this is fantastic and so is the main character. I definitely jumped, there were tense moments, and I loved the plot. I wasn’t terrified at any point, so it was a good fit for my “I want to be scared but also able to sleep” attitude.
- Shane’s rating: 8
- My rating: 8
- Another found footage-style horror movie, this Taiwanese supernatural story is really well told, and I was still thinking about it the next morning. The child actor in this is fantastic and so is the main character. I definitely jumped, there were tense moments, and I loved the plot. I wasn’t terrified at any point, so it was a good fit for my “I want to be scared but also able to sleep” attitude.
- The Manor (Netflix)
- Eh. It wanted to be scarier than it was. From the jump, it doesn’t make sense that the main character, who has a stroke but only limps afterward, would move into a nursing home. There seems to be tight security, but her grandson somehow just bursts in late at night whenever he feels the need. I typed up a whole rant about this movie, but the summary is that I was left disappointed.
- Shane’s rating: 7
- My rating: 5
- Eh. It wanted to be scarier than it was. From the jump, it doesn’t make sense that the main character, who has a stroke but only limps afterward, would move into a nursing home. There seems to be tight security, but her grandson somehow just bursts in late at night whenever he feels the need. I typed up a whole rant about this movie, but the summary is that I was left disappointed.
- The Wretched (Netflix)
- Is horror/coming of age a category of movies? Because that’s very much what this is. It was definitely creepy and I enjoyed it, but it was definitely more atmospheric than out and out horror. This is a movie that would have been better served by leaving the monster invisible.
- Shane’s rating: 6
- My rating: 5
- Is horror/coming of age a category of movies? Because that’s very much what this is. It was definitely creepy and I enjoyed it, but it was definitely more atmospheric than out and out horror. This is a movie that would have been better served by leaving the monster invisible.
- Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022) (Netflix)
- I’ve read a lot of bad reviews comparing it to the original, but since I never saw that one, it doesn’t factor into my “review”. It was gory in the right way – people being chain sawed to death, not tortured grotesquely. It wasn’t a deep story, but at one point Leatherface bursts out of a very-out-of-place pool like a dang dolphin and that was fun. I will say that the 70 year old killer should probably not be that spritely. Shane says it’s too “made for teenagers”.
- Shane’s rating: 4
- My rating: 6
- I’ve read a lot of bad reviews comparing it to the original, but since I never saw that one, it doesn’t factor into my “review”. It was gory in the right way – people being chain sawed to death, not tortured grotesquely. It wasn’t a deep story, but at one point Leatherface bursts out of a very-out-of-place pool like a dang dolphin and that was fun. I will say that the 70 year old killer should probably not be that spritely. Shane says it’s too “made for teenagers”.
- Hideout (Amazon)
- I didn’t like this one. The story had potential, but the acting, writing, & pacing wasn’t great. I don’t really have anything else to say about it.
- Shane’s rating: 5 (for the story, apparently)
- My rating: 3
- I didn’t like this one. The story had potential, but the acting, writing, & pacing wasn’t great. I don’t really have anything else to say about it.
- The Deep House (Amazon)
- I really didn’t like this one, either. It could have been super scary – they’re trapped in an underwater haunted house, but it wasn’t. I’m pretty sure the actors playing the main couple actually hated each other, which was kind of a bummer.
- Shane didn’t watch this one.
- My rating: 2
- I really didn’t like this one, either. It could have been super scary – they’re trapped in an underwater haunted house, but it wasn’t. I’m pretty sure the actors playing the main couple actually hated each other, which was kind of a bummer.
- Dark Light (Amazon)
- I liked this one! Is it groundbreaking? No. Was the monster cool? Yes. There were lots of bad choices, and the more you think about the movie, the more plot holes pop up, but it was a perfectly good horror movie.
- Shane didn’t watch this one.
- My rating: 6
- I liked this one! Is it groundbreaking? No. Was the monster cool? Yes. There were lots of bad choices, and the more you think about the movie, the more plot holes pop up, but it was a perfectly good horror movie.
- The Town That Dreaded Sundown (Amazon)
- I wanted this to be more slasher-y than it was. There were a couple good deaths, and there’s a pretty solid twist, but it wasn’t super slashy. In it’s defense, I had to stop it a couple of times to change out the laundry so the atmosphere was broken a bunch.
- Shane didn’t watch this one.
- My rating: 6
- I wanted this to be more slasher-y than it was. There were a couple good deaths, and there’s a pretty solid twist, but it wasn’t super slashy. In it’s defense, I had to stop it a couple of times to change out the laundry so the atmosphere was broken a bunch.
- Hell House, LLC (Amazon)
- This has been the biggest surprise of the movies. It was so good, I got spooked out when I watched it in the middle of the day, and I don’t want to know how spooked I’d be if I watched it late at night. No real jump scares, just dread and slowly built eeriness. I loved the documentary-style interviews intercut with footage from the Haunted House. I didn’t love the ending, I wish it had stopped a little sooner and we were left not knowing what happened. But, honestly, love it.
- Shane didn’t watch this one.
- My rating: 9 (-1 for the ending)
- This has been the biggest surprise of the movies. It was so good, I got spooked out when I watched it in the middle of the day, and I don’t want to know how spooked I’d be if I watched it late at night. No real jump scares, just dread and slowly built eeriness. I loved the documentary-style interviews intercut with footage from the Haunted House. I didn’t love the ending, I wish it had stopped a little sooner and we were left not knowing what happened. But, honestly, love it.
- House of 9 (Amazon)
- You know when a movie is so good the plot holes don’t matter? You just gloss right over them. This is not that movie. The twist is somehow predictable but also makes no sense. I’m not going to suggest anyone watch it unless they’re trying to watch everything Peter Capaldi is in.
- Shane literally slept through this – snores and all.
- My rating: 2
- You know when a movie is so good the plot holes don’t matter? You just gloss right over them. This is not that movie. The twist is somehow predictable but also makes no sense. I’m not going to suggest anyone watch it unless they’re trying to watch everything Peter Capaldi is in.
- Creep (Netflix)
- I know this is a much beloved horror movie, but it isn’t for me. Even though it’s found footage, it just doesn’t build the suspense and I don’t buy into the story as much as I was expecting. I didn’t hate it, it’s far better than some of the movies I’ve watched, and I can appreciate the premise, but it’s not a movie I’ll watch again. It’s one of Shane’s favorites, though.
- Shane’s rating: 7
- My rating: 4
Coffee & Crows 